Day 29: Subject Ponders Bikinis and Bellies.

I bought some bikinis--

--Now, lest you get the wrong impression about what a big spender I am, I feel I should tell you that I purchased these bikinis at Savers.  The nice thing about thrift store bikinis is that they're only $5, which means you can get two.  Two is the correct number of of bikinis.  Two means that if you're swimming more than once a day, you don't have to try to wiggle into a wet suit.  It also means you can have one traditional bikini bottom, and one super cute boy short bottom.  Yaaaaaas--

--so, anyway, now I have a couple of months to accustom myself to the idea before wearing them.  Why, you may ask, did I buy bikinis if I didn't want to wear them?  Well, it's not that simple.

See, I like bikinis.  I have an oddly shaped torso, and one-piece suits are often uncomfortable for me.  I also have a bust size and a hip size that most manufacturers don't think go together, so generally either my boobs get smooshed flat or the bottom is a little flappy.  NOT WHAT YOU WANT IN A SWIMSUIT.  Buying bikinis solves both these problems as I can fit top and bottom separately, and my odd torso shape doesn't even play into it.

All that being said, I haven't worn a bikini in nine years.  Not since I got pregnant with Elliot.  I mean, I support all those "Want to have a bikini body?  Put a bikini on your body.  Done."  kind of campaigns that are going around, but it's one thing to believe that in your heart, and another to have the brass ovaries to ignore decades of body image issues and just do it.  I've never quite worked up the nerve.

But this spring, as I was sorting through my warm weather clothes and noticing how badly I needed a new swimsuit, I finally got fed up with myself.

After all, what is it that I'm so self-conscious about?  My stomach isn't flat?  Yeah, well, me and most of the rest of America.  So what?  

Is it the stretch marks?  Hell, no.  Those are war wounds.  I'm not going to be self-conscious about them.

So, today I am biting the bullet.  I am going to post a picture of my belly, war wounds and all.  Then, when the air warms up, I'm gonna rock my bikini, feeling secure in the knowledge that everyone has already seen my tummy, anyway.

This is mah belly.  Right here.

**I have a little belly

I like to feed it food

It jiggles when I shimmy

But still, it shimmies good

Oh belly, belly, belly

You are a little plump

But I won't let that stop me

Because I'm not a chump

**With apologies to the dreidel song.